Well, you knew it was bound to happen. Whenever the finest (and sickest) minds in the country gather, it is only a matter of time before Alex Moby Dick Franklin, aka Dr. Franklinstein's Monster appears. Corrupted since birth, Moby has honed his terrorist tendencies in the hallowed halls of Harvard. Since then, the value of a Harvard degree has plummeted. From the depths of those virgin slaying days, he has risen to a level at which none other would dare to tread -- Hollywood Lackey.

Seen here being serviced by a sheep while using her as a beer rest, Moby exhibits the finest in fashion. The reverse view would read, "Then Leave!"

Alex was the owner of the fourth sheep in our clan but he foully murdered Anastasia in an unspeakable manner. We expect there was mutton on the menu that week. Rumor has it that this vile beast is in the market for a new sheep victim. We fear for her safety.